I cut my hair last night. Pendek paras bahu. No help. My own hand. So you know how horrible my precious hair look like now. Potong sebab tiba-tiba rasa komitmen untuk jaga rambut panjang dah kurang dah, plus, my hair dah agak damaged dekat hujung-hujung. Kesan rebond. So I reach my scissor and cutting them like a crazy woman. Dan buat pertama kali dalam hidup, setengah jam selepas menggunting rambut, I still don't regret it. Now almost 24 hours, still no sign of regretting. Unlike before theehe. I'm so pathetic back then. And still, I guess.

Pathetic, ever.

Who doesn't? Everybody have their pathetic moment.

I cried hard on 3,4 days ago. I'm not very good at handling my anger towards some species of human. I was angry, and cara saya menzahirkan rasa marah tu adalah dengan menangis since I can't do anything much about it. Or maybe that's why I cried. I can't control things which is beyond my kudrat and expectations. I was angry at my most moderately anger. However at some point I burst out crying ehem excuse me I've been holding it for almost one month. Plus, so what if I cried? That reflects my humanity.

Kenapa saya marah-marah? Good question. It's hard to trust people these days. But I'm not even going to be mad anymore. I just have to learn how to expect the lowest from people I thought of the highest. Sampai hari Isnin baru-baru ini, masih lagi ada mesej-mesej berbaur makian dan lucah dan sumpahan yang salah seorang penari saya terima. By a bunch of ignorable stupid kids tried to take my dancers down and spread out gossips. Gossips that drag out Tari Kirana's name.

How forgetful, bukankah ALLAH ada? HE knows the truth.

Once I let it all out, I felt better. Nobody ever said life was easy.. They just promised that it would be worth it. The day after last Monday, I went to Poring Hot Spring, tempat yang sangat terkenal di Ranau (my place), among the tourists and locals. Tak pernah bosan sebenarnya main dengan air and treat myself in those public bath-tub. Haha. Kolam adalah sangat banyak. The best part is, SPONTAN! Tidak rancang pun. Actually malam sebelum ada cakap-cakap juga tentang tu, but end up cerita hal lain. Esok paginya around 11AM, my friend ajak sekali lagi. I texted the Tari Kirana girls and wala, at around 2.30PM we arrived safely. Itupun lepas tunggang langgang my mum punya dapur. Haha. What do you expect? 2 hours preparing lunch for my family untuk 7 orang dan juga juadah untuk picnic untuk 8 orang. Next 30 minutes  I spent to prepare the picnic basket, 30 minutes to prepare myself, 30 minutes to wait for the girls - which I hated the most (- -") and another last 30 minutes driving to Poring. Oh we really had blast. I laughed a lot. Our visit to Poring saya boleh sifatkan sebagai untuk menghiburkan hati saya. Untuk mengingatkan diri saya sendiri untuk melihat kehidupan itu dari perspektif yang positif.

Maybe I'll update some pictures of that day later on this blog and Tari Kirana's page.

Back to present.

Bukannya semua yang buruk-buruk ada dalam life saya sekarang ni. Lately I tend to blog about bad thing happened in my life rather than the good things. Or do I always do that here? My life is good sebenarnya, nothing too bad at all. Why, can't I have my moment of bitching about life? Hahaha. I am grateful for what I have today, you know. Sometimes I wish I'm living a different life, but there's a reason for everything. There's hikmah for all these. I could feel it. Whatever happen, there's always hikmah. Always.

Okey, bercerita soal-soal macam ni suddenly makes me hungry.